Really Cool, “Real” Bath Toys

Zach performs bath duty on Luke every night while I do the dinner dishes.  It is a great arrangement – I get my break from the bug and Zach doesn’t have to do dishes. 

Zach mentioned that Luke needed some new bath toys.  All he had were some sponge letters.  I looked at a few stores and couldn’t find anything decent that only cost a few bucks.

This past weekend, we got a pleasant surprise:  Zach’s dad sold Zach’s motorcycle, which has been sitting in his dad’s garage for about 9 years.  I’m sure his dad was happier about it than us. 

At any rate, I took some of Zach’s motorcycle money and spent the ridiculous amount of $22 on a bath toy for Luke. 

The Eiffel Tower of Bath Boats

Luke loves it.  The boats can float separately or stack together.  There is a pump that sprays water everywhere.  The pump is a huge hit, according to Zach.  The kid doesn’t want to leave the bathtub.

We were turning in for the night, and I was mentally analyzing my purchase.  I asked Zach if he ever had bath toys.

He replied, “Oh yeah!  We had tons of bath toys.  We had this really cool one that suction-cupped to the wall and it was an entire city.  There were people and boats and stuff.  It was a whole city, suction-cupped to the wall.”

I said, “Oh!  Wow.  Hmmm.”  I lapsed into thought again.

He asked me, “Why?  Did you ever have bath toys?”

“We had a tube sock.”

He paused.  “What?”

I repeated, “Well, we had a tube sock in the bath.” 

He started laughing. 

“We would put it over the faucet and turn the water on.  It was fun.” 

He continued to laugh.  I started giggling too.  He said, “A tube sock??  That’s not a bath toy.  Oh my gosh.  You are so freaking Chinese.  What kind of toy is that?”

Apparently, this is not a "real" bath toy, nor is it cool.

I protested between fits of laughter, “No, really, it was fun!  Sometimes we would fill it up with water and squeeze it.”

“I can just see it now.  You little kids in the tub asking your dad for a toy and he tosses you a tube sock.”

I replied, “Bath toys are expensive.”

“I hope you don’t pass any of your weird Asian stuff on down to Luke.  I don’t want to catch him giving my grandkids tube socks to play with in the tub.”

At this point, I realized that a tube sock was an incredibly lame bath toy.  As we both continued to laugh, I stated, “Well, I don’t want Luke to get spoiled.”

Zach said, “Yes.  He’s going to get spoiled.  He has boats in his tub.  Next time he has Room Time, why don’t you take all of his toys away and give him a tube sock to play with.  I’m sure he will be really happy.”

He rolled over and went to sleep.

I continued to chuckle to myself.  Who knew?


About pokedpotato

Cheese lover.
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5 Responses to Really Cool, “Real” Bath Toys

  1. Julia says:

    Hahahahahahaha. Tube sock! Tube SUCK in other words. If it’s any consolation, I can’t recall having bath toys either. Baths aren’t supposed to be fun, dang it! Get in, get clean, get out.

    This probably explains why I have, over the years of my motherhood, spent so much money on bath toys. They have those bath crayons and bath paints where you can scrawl all over the tub without consequence; then there’s the water mills and squeezy bath squirters. So much bath fun! I look forward to hearing about how Luke’s baths become explorations in science, fluid dynamics and creative expression.

    • pokedpotato says:

      That’s exactly what I say Julia! Well, until Zach sells another bike, no more bath toys for the little kid. (I’m sure that statement will never hold). We’ll see if Luke becomes a little engineer from all these cool toys, or if instead they stunt his imagination because he doesn’t have to imagine…

  2. Angelena says:

    We currently give the boys deli containers (minus the ham and turkey). Why, you ask?

    We bought them color bath foam. Xavier sprayed it in Eph’s eyes and we had to visit the emergency room.

    We bought them foam animals, numbers and alphabet letters- and they ate them.

    We bought them large lego toys that broke apart and now are the permanent reason that the tub doesn’t drain. (Right- I know- legos aren’t supposed to go in the bath, but at a certain point, you get desperate).

    We bought them We bought bath “safe” crayons that you are supposed to write on the tile and stuff with and it’s supposed to be fantastic. So, guess who spent about two hours post house sale scrubbing the walls inhaling bleach fumes?

    I think your sock sounds fantastic. Listen, they don’t know what they are missing unless you give them all the great stuff first. How old are you and you are just now deciding that this tube sock wasn’t such a great toy? Uh-huh. 🙂

    • pokedpotato says:

      Wow Angel. This made me totally laugh & feel bad for you at the same time. =) You have the funniest stories about your boys and yet some of them are totally tragic as well.

      I know right?? The things I learned from Zach. I wonder what else about my childhood is pathetically uncool…

  3. Angelena says:

    Oh, Becca. I think I have a treasure trove of lawsuits in my back pocket. Alas, most of them will never see the light of day.

    Also, I didn’t realize how poor my grammar was in that paragraph- whew! It must be the bleach fumes.


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